This is our second week being with the kids and I am thankful to say that they are behaving so much better! Last week was absolutely exhausting, frustrating, yet also very enlightening. We learned that we must plan. Those who know me know that I am not a planner unless I am thinking about 6 years in the future and freaking out about it. But without plans..the children will try to kill each other. Conclusion: plan or die. So that's what we did this week, we have worked on planning out every moment of our time with the kids and so far so good. They were angels Monday and Tuesday..and today we took them to an indoor water park/splash park. It was fun.. but we had 17 kids today; 7 more than we had planned. It was a logistical nightmare but once we got into the park they had a blast, and so did we the "adults". It's still a little weird that I am being lumped into this category because half of the kids think I am 16 and call me Lizzy and the other half ask me where my children are while I'm here and call me Miss Lizzy (or Kelsey or Katy; few have realized my name isn't actually Lizzy). Oh well.
The weekend was a much needed reprieve from the busy and exhausting week we had last week. Friday was awful and I felt like I was going to lose it with the kids. I didn't thankfully. Over the weekend I was able to do some reflecting on the previous week. I am having a much easier time keeping my cool than I thought I was going to. I have been very good at not losing my patience and dealing with the children in the best way I know how. It is very easy to get frustrated with the kids but I have been able to put myself in their shoes and get a better understand as to why they have the need to act out or misbehave.
Their culture is very different than the one I am used to, which brings me to the subject of the "otherness" that we are living in. I hate yelling at children. I don't like having to make children afraid of me to listen to me. This really frustrated me last week until I took a step back and realized that it was what they were used to. In their culture and in their homes, the majority of the children are used to being yelled at and being afraid of the person doing the yelling. I am still not okay with yelling but I am getting better at standing my ground and turning the fear into respect. It is only a week in but I can already tell that we are beginning to strengthen our relationships with the kids and slowly but surely are gaining their trust. This may not seem like a big deal but it is monumental. In their world there are few people that they are able to depend on, if any at all. For this reason, trusting the "other" is probably a difficult concept. In this neighborhood "everyone always leaves", and they learn quickly to not get too attached to anyone and to keep their guards up. Well the guards are still up but the walls are slowing crumbling. The tough girls are starting to relax a bit and laugh at the white girl's attempt to step, and the big bad boys are fighting over who gets to help clean up after lunch. It may be a baby step, but at least it's a step forward.
The "otherness" is wearing off and the kids are beginning to claim us as their own- we are working on street names but so far only one of us has been given one. We have only been here for a week and a half and the outlook is very good for the rest of the summer.. or so I hope. This will probably be one of the hardest summers of our lives but we will certainly never regret any moment we have been granted.
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